Tuesday, May 19, 2009

What is going on?

The nasty level is off the charts! Some of you may be aware that Shasta of Bergdorf Blondes was harassed and bullied with comments made about her children. Crossing a line? Definitely! Hateful? Undoubtedly so! The next question has to be - Why? Why in the world would people think it is ok to harass or bully someone? I am all for feedback & constructive criticism. In my career, I've been known for that. Some comments that I've seen made however cross the line of being constructive.

I think this is sitting heavy in my heart because I'm dealing with it at work. One of my teammates has been attacking me lately with comments (over the phone since we're not in the same state) that are belittling, condescending, hateful, offensive...I could go on & on.

A few of my favorites from the last three phone calls:

"We shouldn't discuss HR Laws because the people in the field don't deal with that. We'll lose credibility."
NOTE: We're seeing increasing instances of harassment, bullying and discrimination in our workforce. So explain to me how these are not timely.

"Because you sent an unfinished document, I felt that you were deliberately trying to undermine me."
NOTE: The document was not marked as a final edit & I have never had a problem sharing my work in an unfinished state because I like feedback & suggestions.

"You've obviously never worked as more than an individual contributor."
NOTE: I've worked far beyond an individual contributor role & have managed many teams, led many implementations & built train*ng programs from the ground up - including hiring instructi*nal design*rs, fa*ilitators, etc. (all traini*ng terms).

"The reason you don't get it is either from ignorance on your part or because you want to play games and swoop in and win the day."

She then went on to highlight her 20 years of experience while insinuating that since I don't have her years of experience that I'm not qualified.

I finally yesterday during our call told her that I was offended and insulted.

So again, where is all the nasty coming from?


Anonymous said...

Oh my, that's awful! I don't understand why people do this stuff! I'm with you; I just keep wondering WHY!

lauren said...

Oh no, what has happened to the Bergdorf Blondes blog? I just tried to go to it and the link does not work :(

I can't believe you have to deal with it at work - that woman is definitely crossing a line! Why would anyone think that is okay - or productive? She obviously has some major issues - I join you in asking why!!

Brittany Ann said...

Oh my goodness! Why is she so rude? What happened to human decency? This makes me so mad! You handled it with real class! Thank goodness she isn't in the same state as you. I think I'd want to slap her!

littlesack said...

ugh! Idk what's going on in the world, but it is really hurtful. My supervisor is very similar to your co-worker. It's almost debilitating. Glad you stood up for yourself!

Amber said...

Ugh, I hate nasty! Why can't everyone just smile and be nice? Sorry you have to deal with this :-(

Whitney said...

I wondered where her wonderful blog had gone! That makes me so sad - I enjoyed reading about her!
People just need to sit down somewhere and shut up!